Bergen County Divorce Law Firm
Tips For Protecting Children During Divorce
The Radol Law Firm works to help couples avoid the emotional damage that divorcing parents unintentionally cause to their children. Although divorcing parents are going through an emotionally trying time themselves, they must care for the emotional needs of their children. Below are just some of the ways The Radol Law Firm believes parents can help their children through these tough times. Our firm is here to help. Contact our firm for a consultation.
Most parents are capable of fulfilling the needs of their children during a divorce. Divorce is a confusing and frightening time for children. Divorce brings about extensive and permanent changes to their lives. To accept and cope with these changes, children must be reassured by both parents that they are loved and that they will be taken care of no matter what. Parents should reassure their children often and as many times as they need.
Another way you can reassure your children is by sharing information about the divorce with them. However, the information shared must be age appropriate and limited to what they need know or what they are emotionally equipped to handle. For example, it is expected that parents will tell their children they are divorcing, but the children do not need to know all the details of why they are divorcing. This is especially true for younger children.
Children need structure in their lives. During a divorce, keeping their regular routines and schedules such as bedtimes, meals, and other daily activities also helps to reassure them. Parents should also continue to parent their children as they normally would. This includes having the same expectations and using the same disciplinary measures as they did with their children before the divorce.
Parents need to monitor the development of their children closely during the divorce process. The exposure to the stress and conflict of the divorce can delay development of the children or actually cause regression. For example, children who have been successfully toilet trained prior to the divorce may have a significant increase in the number of accidents during the divorce. For older children, those who are usually talkative and outgoing before the divorce may become moody and quiet during the divorce.
Fortunately, children tend to recover from these delays or regressions as their situation becomes more stable and predictable. Any severe regression, prolonged regression and developmental delays or destructive behavior must be addressed immediately. In these cases, it may be a good idea for the parent to seek out individual or family counseling.
Setting the Example
Children will handle the divorce process as well or as poorly as the parents do. If a parent succumbs to the stresses of divorce and becomes constantly moody, depressed or devolves into a whimpering mess, they will find that their children will do the same. It’s okay to cry or express sadness about the divorce on occasion, but parents must set the example by acknowledging these feelings with their children and then quickly setting them aside.
Parents must present themselves to their children as strong and confident leaders of the family, despite their inner turmoil. Doing so reassures the children that their parents are able to remain strong during adversity and they will likely try do the same.
Seek Legal Assistance From An Englewood Divorce Lawyer
At The Radol Law Firm, our Englewood Divorce Lawyer strives to reach a workable settlement that will save you the stress and expense of a trial. If divorce is something you are considering and you would like to speak with an experienced Englewood Divorce Lawyer, contact our firm for a consultation.